- UX Designer – Yammer
- Years at Microsoft: 1.5
An Introvert’s Guide to Aggression
“If you’re a woman, be 30% more aggressive than you think you should be. If you’re an Asian woman, be 40% more aggressive… and if you’re Sarah, be 50% more aggressive.”
My manager gave me this advice when I joined Yammer straight out of college, when I was introverted and quiet to such a degree that it quickly became a running joke. Though we laughed at the time, her piece of advice has been the most influential one I’ve received in my career.
I’ve never seen my introversion as a detriment; I’ve always believed in chewing my words before I speak. The reality of working in tech, however, is that there are a lot of passionate, driven people with big ideas and even bigger voices. Yammer in particular fosters a work environment that places tremendous value on open discussion and debate. Being vocal about what you’re passionate about or—perhaps more importantly—what you disagree with is essential in having an impact.
For those starting out and looking to speak up, here are the steps I’ve taken (and am still taking) toward making myself heard:
- Find your digital voice.One lesson I quickly learned is that having a voice doesn’t necessarily mean physically speaking up. The simplest and most frictionless way to be heard is to make posts about your concerns and participate in Yammer conversations (or email threads for those who don’t use Yammer). Written conversations are advantageous because there’s time to consider your words and communicate exactly what you’re thinking.
- Seek out mentors.When I started out, speaking up in a room of people I had never met was a daunting task. Finding people whose communication methods I appreciated provided me with models for verbalizing my thoughts and developing my soft skills. My “mentors” (whether they realized it or not) were all different: male, female, quiet, outspoken. The attributes I admired from each became attributes I incorporated into my own physical and verbal languages.
- Omit “but” from your vocabulary.In practice, I’ve come to apply this last piece of advice more metaphorically than literally. Uncertainty can be unwittingly communicated through not only the wrong phrasing of a statement, but through body language as well. If you have little to say, don’t negate what you do put out there. Making eye contact and pacing the rhythm of my speech have been my ways of combatting my physical “buts.”
When I first started out, my manager’s advice became my mantra. I reminded myself to be 50% more aggressive, on perpetual repeat. As time passed, it became 40%, then 30%, then 20%; now, I no longer have to tell myself it at all. Being aggressive simply means knowing how to present your voice the way you want it heard, when you want it heard—and for an introvert, learning how to use that to your advantage.
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Sarah Lin graduated from the Rhode Island School of Design with a BFA in Graphic Design. She currently works as a UX Designer at Yammer, and in her off-time enjoys headbanging and eating chicken wings (though not always together).
